Broken

Men are fucked. Surprisingly, I've only recently come to realize this.

I've watched more movies than I can count that are predicated on the fact that some girl is playing games with her male companion's head. I hate those movies. Whether it be consciously or unintentionally, I always figured that a good girlfriend, wife, etc. would consciously make an effort to be not crazy (i.e. none of the "I don't want to tell you what I mean, you should know" bullshit). She would exhibit none of the scheming, conniving, spying and she certainly would not expect the man to read her mind. A woman should be straightforward, tell the man what she wants, and only after he's aware of her expectations and still doesn't meet them—only then can she be upset.

As I'm sure the men who are reading this realized years ago, it doesn't really work like that. You can wish it to be so, but it's probably not going to happen. The sad part is, I only realized this two days ago.

So I met this guy who I thought was cute. It was a rather normal day other than that: class, homework, tv, bed. Woke up the next day and went about my usual business. Do you know how sometimes you'll be doing something like homework and in the middle of a thought you'll just have a flash of something cross your mind? For example, Ax = [insert picture of chocolate ice cream] b. Now, some of them you can ignore, like this chocolate ice cream one. But some of them shock you to the core and you have to stop what you're doing to think about it. That's what happened two days ago. I was walking back from class thinking about what I learned and a picture of me and the guy I just met picking out a place for our wedding went through my head. See, you think that's the strange part. No. The strange part was that when it shocked me and I stopped to think about it, my immediate thought was how that made perfect sense in the storyline: I could picture everything that had happened up to that point and everything that was going to happen after. But only for a split second. Then I thought, Wait, when did I come up with this??? No matter how sane you try to be, there's this crazy part of you that plans out your entire future with someone without you even knowing it. It's sick. It's wrong. It happens anyway.

Obviously, I would never hold anyone to these crazy, subconscious, girl expectations. But they still exist. And that is why you men don't stand a chance. I apologize and thank you for putting up with us anyway.